


on my own long enough

by lesdienne



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Insecure Magnus Bane, M/M, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:14:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24187225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesdienne/pseuds/lesdienne
Summary: Alec brings their clasped hands to his lips, brushing the slightest of kisses over the back of Magnus’s hand. Magnus closes his eyes, overcome with the tenderness Alec is showing him. His heart feels full, fit to burst.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 8
Kudos: 70





	on my own long enough

**Author's Note:**

> A very short fic for the "5 months of shadowhunters" by izzymalec and permetstu on tumblr. This fills week six, "fav scene". its a missing scene that i place within the same night of the flashbacks from 2x18 of magnus and alec's first night together which are my favorite scenes in the show. obviously i'm working with a loose understanding of the prompt but i hope you like it anyway!

Magnus slumps down over Alec, his heart pounding and his breath still coming a little quick. He presses a kiss to Alec’s neck.

“Mmmmmm. That was nice.”

Alec snorts. 

“I think that’s a bit of an understatement, don’t you?”

They shift, Magnus moving fully off Alec’s body as he turns onto his side. Magnus reorients to his back, staring up at his ceiling. There’s a thin crack in the paint. 

Alec’s hand tangles with his, his head rests on the same pillow as Magnus’s, his body scrunched and contorted, just a little, so that their heads are barely inches apart. They both lay in a calm, content quiet as they come down from the high of orgasm. 

“You know, I was eager to do… this, a few weeks ago… but now that it’s happened, I’m glad we waited, even if it was just a little while. I can’t imagine anything we could have done then that would have been better than this.” 

Magnus moves again, rolling onto his side so that their noses are practically touching. His thumb rubs over the back of Alec’s hand soothingly. Whether that’s for Alec or Magnus’s benefit, Magnus isn’t sure.

“You’re right. It was perfect, my little crisis notwithstanding.”

“Hey. That wasn’t a crisis. It was amazing. Your eyes- your Mark- they’re amazing.”

Alec brings their clasped hands to his lips, brushing the slightest of kisses over the back of Magnus’s hand. Magnus closes his eyes, overcome with the tenderness Alec is showing him. His heart feels full, fit to burst.

“Is that why you didn’t want to, before? Did you think I’d react badly?”

Magnus feels heat rise to his face. He clears his throat softly before answering. 

“Well. In part, yes, that’s why I was nervous. It wouldn’t be the first time my Mark scared someone away. I didn’t want to scare you away. I think maybe… it might have broken my heart, to do that.”

“Why else?”

“Mmm?”  
Magnus hummed. 

“You said that your Mark was part of the reason you weren’t ready before. Why else?”

“Well. Um. Ha.”

Magnus sat up quickly, bunching up the pillow behind him and pressing his back against the headboard of the bed. This time, his face was burning with an embarrassed heat. 

“The truth is. Well. The truth is it’s been a long time. For me. Since I was… intimate… especially with someone I cared about as much as I care about you. I suppose I was nervous… that I’d be bad at it. Or that I’d forgotten how to be a good lover. I don’t know, it was stupid.”

Magnus barks out a short, uncomfortable laugh. Alec sits up, slowly, solemnly. He’d never let go of Magnus's hand, and now he captures Magnus’s free hand too, giving both a reassuring squeeze. He looks squarely into Magnus’s eyes as he speaks in an earnest tone. 

“Magnus. I am 25 years old. You are… so attractive. You are clearly willing to put in effort towards making your partner feel good, in bed or otherwise. And. Until an hour ago, I was a virgin. There is no way that having sex with you could have been anything but amazing.”

Magnus sniffed. In a faux haughty tone, he said

“How do I know that that little speech wasn’t the heady remnants of a first mutual orgasm talking?”

Even as he spoke, Magnus could feel his face stretching into a pleased grin. His insecurities quelled, he felt a light giddiness rising up in his chest, and he fell back onto the bed, pulling Alec with him. Alec pulled him into a sweet kiss, and they laid their heads down once again.

**Author's Note:**

> special thanks to my friend stacey for reading it for me and telling me it wasn't horrible, as I haven't written creatively in years and was very insecure about it. 
> 
> thanks for reading and i hope you enjoyed!


End file.
